Copycat...But well worth it

It is late. After midnight and I can not sleep. I have been laying in bed praying over so many things. Elizabeth had a softball game tonight (victory) and her Papa gave her a digital camera after the game. She was excited and we had dinner and went to bed late. We have created a Phillips sanctuary in the Master Bedroom. Mike sleeps in the hospital bed and Elizabeth and I sleep in the King bed. We have been reading through the Chronological Bible and then a little out of the book Heaven most nights. Tonight was great. We read from both books and then talked and even laughed. Mike actually downed about 1/2 bottle of water. I didn't say anything, but I noticed. AND it hasn't come back up. I also anointed him tonight with oil and prayed over him. It has been awhile and I really felt lead to do it.

Anyway, both Mike and Elizabeth are softly snoring and I finally decided to get up. I tried to catch up on some blogs and came across this posting from Connor's website.

"It doth not yet appear what we shall be." 1 John 3:2

Naturally, we are inclined to be so mathematical and calculating that we look upon uncertainty as a bad thing. We imagine that we have to reach some end, but that is not the nature of spiritual life. The nature of spiritual life is that we are certain in our uncertainty, consequently we do not make our nests anywhere. Common sense says - "Well, supposing I were in that condition . . ." We cannot suppose ourselves in any condition we have never been in. Certainty is the mark of the common-sense life: gracious uncertainty is the mark of the spiritual life. To be certain of God means that we are uncertain in all our ways, we do not know what a day may bring forth. This is generally said with a sigh of sadness, it should be rather an expression of breathless expectation. We are uncertain of the next step, but we are certain of God. Immediately we abandon to God, and do the duty that lies nearest, He packs our life with surprises all the time. Jesus said, "Except ye become as little children." Spiritual life is the life of a child. We are not uncertain of God, but uncertain of what He is going to do next. If we are only certain in our beliefs, we get dignified and severe and have the ban of finality about our views; but when we are rightly related to God, life is full of spontaneous, joyful uncertainty and expectancy."Believe also in Me," said Jesus, not - "Believe certain things about Me." Leave the whole thing to Him, it is gloriously uncertain how He will come in, but He will come. Remain loyal to Him.

This stopped me in my tracks again. I thought of my last posting and all the sighs and tears. To be certain of God mean we are to be uncertain of what the day may bring. This is usually said with a sigh... I want to turn my sighs into breathless expectation.

My Breathless Expectations -

1. The Doctor's appointment in the morning - that I am sure I will be chipper after a only a few hours of sleep.

2. God's complete healing of Mike's issues with his esophagus right now. Praise God for allowing Mike to drink water tonight.

3. God's angels on earth- more unexpected encounters. I have had one with Tina at the Cancer Center. She is alive 4 years after a 3 month death sentence. Bread of Life delivered to our door from Angie. Phone call from Robin. Roxanne talking me through the battle yet again. Carol's helpful post.

4. Mike is at 8 months and 3 days since our "death sentence". 9 months was the longest they gave us. Only God knows our day and time.

5. Tessa - Leave the whole thing to Him, it is gloriously uncertain how He will come in, but He will come. Remain loyal to Him.

6. Our House - I truly wait to see what He does. He gave us that house. The way it unfolded was of Him. So I trust.

7. The Va - It didn't even occur to me to contact my Congressman. I was able to place a phone call and fax some paperwork. More than that, I was able to talk to his staff about the concurrent receipt. That still bugs me and I know that it is too late for us. However, it doesn't seem right that if someone is 100% service connected disabled that they can't get concurrent receipt if they have not put in 20 years. I think that rule should apply no matter the time put in. I will get on my soapbox about that later.

So I wait with breathless expectation, uncertain of why this world is so full of bad things that are happening all around to the people I love. But I am certain of God; certain of His power, His healing; His love; His promise.

Thank you for loving us through the down days. Sweet Dreams!