Holding Hands

It has been a while since I thought about the title of this blog - In His hand and holding on tightly. My original vision when that came to me was hanging over a cliff and hanging on to his garment for everything I have. Today, the vision that comes to me is holding his hand and him squeezing reassurance that everything will be ok. I trust everything will be ok. Certain in the Uncertainty. The verse that comes to mind is "Cast all your cares on Him, for He cares for you."

Holding hands is such an intimate gesture to me. Do you know it was forever before I allowed myself to hold Mike's hand when we started dating? It was a commitment issue, if I hold his hand it means that I am letting a piece of my heart go, letting him in, showing everything (good and bad). I had no plans on getting involved with anyone. But I finally allowed that connection and was blessed beyond measure. I received so much, more than I ever dreamed. (This is a picture of what it means to finally let go and receive Christ as your Savior).

Mike still amazes me at how well he looks. Better and better everyday. The procedure is over and Mike is asleep in the recliner. His esophagus was down to 7.5 centimeters again. Not at all what we were expecting. He was able to stretch it to a 13 again, but decisions loom. This time, the camera yet again revealed cancerous tissue in the stomach. It also revealed black patches in Mikes esophagus... dead tissue. The doctor is very concerned about doing many more stretches for fear of perforation at the site of the dead tissue. If that happens during the procedure, Mike will die by earthly standards. The GI doctor wants to put in another stent or GTube (feeding tube in the stomach). We have always avoided the feeding tube but apparently there are people that are on it for years. We need to pray about this decision. I can see the advantages of it... be able to juice again for him, organic greens, supplements and off TPN. But there are disadvantages too.

I have called HAP and left a message today to get some clarification on things. Hopefully someone will call back soon. We have also lower the house another $10,000. God willing...

I am emotionally tired today. Oh I can not wait until Jesus returns. What a time that will be...probably just like above- so much more than I ever dreamed!

Holding on!!!

Prayer needs:
Continue healing of cancer in Mike's body
New esophagus for Mike
Medical decisions
House to sell
Us to qualify for HAP
Elizabeth's week full of Elementary Graduation celebrations - that both Mike and I can be at them
My doctor's appointments this week - all will be well and that Mike remains strong so I can make them
Bind Satan from this household
Financial wisdom


Praise:
Wonderful people at the hospital
One more day
all our needs are met today
God's Promise